Chapter 28

Thief (2)

A sloth.

An animal whose name was associated with both trees and laziness.

True to its name, it was famous for how painfully slow every one of its movements was.

Apparently, sloths were so slow that even zoologists who had studied them for two years became frustrated enough to give up.

At first glance, that seemed like an enormous disadvantage in the wild, but sloths were surprisingly efficient animals.

It was the beauty of slowness.

Moving slowly meant consuming less energy.

‘But this is the Forest of Four Seasons.’

I had no idea whether that philosophy of slowness worked in the Forest of Four Seasons.

Even now, it had come face-to-face with me, yet it was still moving at a leisurely pace.

The thing it had been after was clearly the fish inside the tub.

However, I was not sure whether sloths were omnivores.

This was exactly when the Gallery came in handy.

Title: What Is This Thing?
Wild Grylls

(Photo of a sloth caught trying to steal the fish)

I went up to the river and came back down, and this thing was here.

It looks like I caught it trying to steal my fish. Do sloths eat meat?

└ Heavenly Demon) Its very expression exudes composure. Be careful.
　└ ??? You don’t know what a sloth is?
　└ She’s telling him to be careful of a sloth. LOL
　└ This is ridiculous. LOL
　└ Heavenly Demon) Thou fools will regret thy mockery only after being pierced by those vicious claws.

└ Allfather) I did not know sloths lived in the Forest of Four Seasons. They should normally inhabit jungles.
└ Wild Grylls) Sloths don’t eat fish, right?
　└ Allfather) Their primary diet consists of leaves. Furthermore, sloths cannot walk and must crawl. Yet that specimen is supporting its body with both arms like a gorilla. It may not actually be a sloth.

└ Wild Grylls) (Video of the sloth moving extremely slowly)
　└ Allfather) It is a sloth. What the hell is that thing?
└ Wild Grylls) I don’t know either.
└ Even the professor is suffering cognitive dissonance after watching the video. LOL
　└ It’s a species even he’s never seen before. Damn.
└ Isn’t this basically a new research subject?
└ Allfather) It certainly is, but please be careful. Every plant and animal inhabiting the Forest of Four Seasons possesses at least one weapon of its own.

Both the Heavenly Demon and Allfather warned me to be careful.

The difference was that Allfather’s warning came from caution toward the unknown, while the Heavenly Demon seemed to be relying on instinct.

Either way, it did not hurt to be careful around this absurdly slow sloth.

‘To be honest, I could just catch it.’

It was slow enough that I could grab it with my bare hands.

Still, I had no intention of doing so.

Touching it unnecessarily might expose me to disease or parasites.

Wonmo was fine because I had scrubbed him thoroughly, but this creature was different.

‘I should chase it away first.’

Since it had gone after my fish, I had no intention of letting it off without doing anything.

Still, killing it felt a little excessive, so I planned to frighten it away.

“Shoo. Shoo. Go away.”

I tapped it lightly with the back of my sword rather than the blade, and the sloth slowly backed away.

Even the act of retreating was so sluggish that watching it made me feel frustrated.

However, that fish was meant to be my lunch.

I could not give it away, even to a sloth.

“Go eat leaves. That’s what you normally eat, isn’t it?”

“You look like you don’t want to. Why not? Go climb a tree. There’s plenty of food up there.”

The sloth’s perpetually relaxed expression changed slightly.

Its face shifted so subtly that it almost looked annoyed.

It seemed to be saying through its expression, You’re the one who cut down the trees.

If that was really what it meant, then I was sorry.

But I still was not giving it the fish.

“Making that face won’t help. Hurry up and leave.”

“...”

“Tsk. This isn’t working.”

Now, even when I pushed it with the back of my sword, it refused to retreat.

I looked around and picked up a suitable branch.

Poke. Poke. Poke.

When I prodded it with the branch and told it to leave, the sloth finally began backing away again.

Perhaps if I pushed it all the way to a tree, it would return to where it belonged.

Grab—

“Huh?”

But the world rarely went the way I wanted.

The sloth caught the end of the branch with one hand.

After a brief moment of surprise, I pulled backward to retrieve it.

Grip—

“What kind of strength is this...?”

It would not come free.

The sloth was far stronger than it looked.

Perhaps that was only natural for an animal that spent its life climbing trees. Its arms had to be powerful.

Rather than getting into a pointless contest of strength, it would probably be easier to find another branch.

‘Or should I just put on my gloves and pick it up?’

That might actually be better.

The gloves were inside my pocket.

I put them on and moved behind the still-slow sloth.

It barely moved before I got behind it.

Even when I grabbed its back, it reacted no faster.

“Heave-ho.”

The moment I lifted it, the sloth’s expression shifted into surprise.

Even its facial expressions changed as slowly as its movements.

It was fascinating that such a relaxed-looking face could make an expression like that.

After carrying the sloth to a tree and setting it down, the matter finally seemed settled.

Now I only had to retrieve the antidote and leave to hunt the Golden Poison Frog.

‘Surely it isn’t coming back this way.’

Feeling doubtful, I turned around.

Sure enough, it was approaching me with all its might.

It was moving so earnestly that I almost felt sorry for it.

What was so special about that fish that it was this obsessed?

A sigh escaped me.

‘...This won’t do.’

Words—if they could even be called that—were clearly not enough.

I needed to threaten it more convincingly.

After all, this sloth was a thief trying to steal my precious meal.

I aimed the crossbow at the sloth as it carefully crawled toward me.

Killing it outright felt wrong, so I planned to shoot the ground and frighten it.

Slowly... slowly...

‘...This is driving me insane.’

I was wasting this much time because of one sluggish animal.

Had I been more ruthless, I would have put a hole through its head already.

However, the sloth had not directly harmed me.

Every animal I had killed until now had threatened my life first.

I aimed the crossbow at the ground and fired far enough away that the sloth would not be hit.

Twang! Thunk!

The bolt shot forward at high speed and embedded itself in the dirt.

The sloth slowly lowered its head.

It stared calmly at the bolt sticking out of the ground, then raised its head again.

Slowly... slowly...

“This is driving me crazy.”

What in the world was inside that thing’s head?

Even after all this, it showed no intention of retreating.

In the end, my frustration drove me to ask the Gallery for help.

Title: Someone Tell Me How to Chase This Thing Away
Wild Grylls

(Video of the approaching sloth)

It keeps trying to take my fish.

I picked it up and carried it back to a tree, but it’s still doing this.

I even threatened it with the crossbow, yet it keeps coming. Any advice?

└ Heavenly Demon) What extraordinary perseverance. Thou shouldst learn from it.
└ SwordMaster) Why not just give it the fish? It looks like it’ll keep bothering you otherwise.

└ Wild Grylls) Teachers, I want to eat a proper meal too. Wonmo eats better food than I do.

　└ That’s genuinely pitiful. LOL

└ Why the hell is that thing acting like that? Is there something special about the fish?
└ Wild Grylls) I think it’s because I destroyed its home.
└ Why did you destroy its home?
└ Wild Grylls) I cut down a tree, and apparently that was its house.
└ That sloth can talk?
└ Wild Grylls) No, it’s just a hunch. LOL
└ So you were just talking nonsense. LOL

└ Grylls, are you really going to become a man who loses to a sloth?
└ Wild Grylls) No, but killing it feels a bit much.
└ Just kill it and eat it, or feed it to Wonmo. That would be better.
└ Wild Grylls) Does it taste good?
└ I heard it tastes terrible. That’s probably why it survived humans.

└ Allfather) I have never seen a sloth behave like that before... Fascinating.
└ Even you’ve never seen one like this, Professor?
└ Allfather) I do not know much about the Forest of Four Seasons either. Nor would I ever want to go near it.

There was not much useful advice.

Most people simply suggested killing the sloth.

However, sloths supposedly tasted awful, and their hides were worthless, so I would not be able to sell it either.

It might be fine if Wonmo ate it, but dealing with the remains afterward would be troublesome.

‘Still, I can’t give it the fish.’

Judging by that idiotic persistence, it would steal the fish eventually, no matter how long it took.

I finally had a chance to eat a proper meal after so long, and they expected me to give it up?

Not a chance.

I loaded another bolt and aimed at the sloth.

This time, I would not shoot the ground.

I intended to make the threat unmistakable.

No matter how slow it was, surely it would understand the danger if a bolt passed right beside its head.

‘If I accidentally kill it...’

I would probably feel a little guilty.

I aimed beside the head of the slowly approaching sloth.

The moment it took another step, I pulled the trigger without hesitation.

Twang!

The bolt narrowly grazed past the side of its head.

Despite nearly dying, the sloth’s expression remained as relaxed as ever.

Did it genuinely not realize how close it had come to death, or was even its reaction simply slow?

Its shamelessness was becoming almost comical, and a hollow laugh escaped me.

‘This isn’t working.’

I abandoned the idea of frightening it away.

Perhaps it would only come to its senses after I put a hole through its body.

I needed to hunt the Golden Poison Frog, and this had already delayed me far too long.

I steadied myself and aimed at the sloth’s shoulder.

The bolt was already loaded.

All that remained was to fire.

‘Don’t come back again.’

I muttered the words inwardly and pulled the trigger.

There was no hesitation.

I had already given it plenty of chances.

Twang!

The bolt shot forward like lightning, heading directly for the sloth’s shoulder.

A single hit had been powerful enough to drive even an owlbear into a frenzy.

Since this creature’s hide was much thinner, the bolt would probably pass straight through it.

At least, that was what should have happened.

Whoosh!

The sloth twisted its body slightly and dodged.

It moved at the very last moment, just before the bolt could strike.

There was nothing slow about it.

Its movement had been astonishingly agile.

“Huh?”

Having witnessed it in real time, I could only let out a stupid sound.

What had I just seen?

Had I really watched a sloth dodge a crossbow bolt?

After a brief moment of stunned disbelief, I hurriedly loaded another bolt.

The first time must have been a coincidence.

Perhaps it had moved so slowly that I had simply misjudged its path.

I reassured myself and aimed the crossbow again.

The sloth had already returned to its usual sluggish movements.

Twang!

Another bolt flew.

Swish!

As if to prove the first time had not been an illusion, the sloth dodged again with a burst of lightning-fast movement.

That alone was absurd enough, but what it did next was even more unbelievable.

As though nothing had happened, it resumed its painfully slow approach toward me.

‘...This thing is dangerous.’

I narrowed my eyes and raised my guard.

It was absolutely not something I could take lightly.

It had seen the bolts coming and dodged them.

And it had done so with barely any movement.

A bolt launched from a crossbow traveled extremely fast.

Reacting after seeing it was nearly impossible.

Title: Can Anyone Here Dodge an Arrow After Seeing It?
Wild Grylls

Isn’t that extremely difficult?

Heavenly Demon and SwordMaster, please don’t answer.

└ Heavenly Demon) Why art thou excluding this lady?
└ Wild Grylls) Because if I ask you, you’ll probably just say it’s easy.
└ Heavenly Demon) Thou hast come to understand this lady well. How gratifying.
└ SwordMaster) It’s surprisingly easy. You just watch it and dodge.
└ Wild Grylls) Sigh...

└ You don’t really dodge after seeing the arrow. You predict its trajectory.
└ Yeah, and you watch the archer’s hands. That makes it easier than you’d think.

└ Easy, my ass. LOL. It hits you almost the instant the archer releases the string.
└ Most people calling it easy are probably holding shields. LOL
└ You caught me. LOL

└ Why are you asking, anyway?
└ Wild Grylls) The sloth dodged a bolt after seeing it.
└ What?

└ ???
└ What kind of nonsense is that now?
└ Wild Grylls) I wish it were nonsense too.

Even the Gallery agreed that it was difficult.

They said an ordinary human could not visually track an arrow once it left the string.

And when I told them a sloth had done exactly that, none of them believed me.

‘I saw it with my own eyes, and I still don’t believe it.’

While I was distracted, the sloth drew even closer.

Judging by the distance, it was now about ten meters away.

At this range, dodging after seeing the bolt should be impossible.

I aimed the loaded crossbow at the sloth.

Now that I knew it was dangerous, there would be no more mercy.

‘This time, I’ll aim for the head.’

Without the slightest hesitation, I pulled the trigger.

The instant I did, the sharp bolt shot directly toward the sloth’s head.

At this rate, it would pierce the center of its skull and kill it instantly.

But this was the Forest of Four Seasons.

A place inhabited by every kind of bizarre and extraordinary plant and animal.

Grab!

“...Holy shit.”

The sloth caught the bolt aimed at its face with one hand.

It slowly lowered the hand covering its face and stared calmly at me.

Its unbearably relaxed expression seemed to be saying only one thing.

Too slow.